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The Fortress of Snarkitude

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I'm not particularly proud of this but I need help [Dec. 10th, 2014|12:13 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
My situation here has become very dicey. I'm $350 short of my basic bills for December. I'm doing everything possible and I know many people have helped, but if you can and are so inclined, here's a link to my emergency survival fund:

http://www.gofundme.com/i2zrlo
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The Year From Hell [Oct. 18th, 2014|07:26 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
This not only describes my current situation but was also my favorite episodes of Star Trek: Voyager. The basic premise was that this ship in unfamiliar territory was just trying to get home but everything started going wrong and they were being constantly hounded and hunted and taking damage to the point where there was no repairing things, just a struggle to keep enough together to survive and hopefully outpace their troubles.

And here I am. At 50 I find myself with no family, few friends, a career in shambles. My choices have led me to this mess and like Voyager, the damage is showing. Somehow I have to marshall resources and keep the ship moving, in the hope of reaching safe haven.

It would help if I knew where I was going. When I was younger, that seemed to sort itself out. This no longer seems to be the case and while I've been painfully detoxing from anything that could get in the way of my vision, I still have no direction.

So now that I'm past the fights with crooked former employers and fun side-adventures like my three month relationship that ended with me being broken up with via text message (welcome to modern dating!), I need a safe haven. Somewhere.
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What happens when a writer doesn't write? [Oct. 15th, 2014|11:02 am]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
I'm finding out the answer and I don't really like it. Truth is, I feel like my head is finally clearing. So, I'm going to start posting more here. I need a project. This drifting aimlessly is no longer serving me.
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It's 95 degrees today [Sep. 11th, 2014|03:31 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
Conditions outside are cruelly unpleasant. Hot, dry, no air moving. Curiously, this is the worst stretch of heat all summer long and is expected to last at least a week.

I'm job hunting in earnest. At this point anything indoors would be acceptable.
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The Blood Fountain seems a little sad today [Sep. 3rd, 2014|07:10 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
I blame the humidity.
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You get content on here no one on Facebook gets to see [Aug. 29th, 2014|12:12 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
Mainly because it won't display animated gifs, the Lord's greatest gift:



Beautiful, no?
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And then she blew me off [Aug. 17th, 2014|12:25 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
Probably just as well. Andrea's health has been on serious decline since June. I sort of understand how she felt pressured to text or call occasionally, but honestly, I think it was more the pressure she felt from me to get help that caused her to pull back. I think she's comfortable just sitting home and spiraling in decline. I understand, I have my own take on self-destructive isolation.

So it's back to the kitties and I. Cats are more reliable than people, anyway. And my usually friendly neighbors have had me over for dinner & conversation so I'm not completely isolated. Time to get myself on track, this whole mini-relationship thing distracted me too much.
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Andrea blew off her appointment [Aug. 8th, 2014|12:02 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
Some things I really don't understand. I know she has gastrointestinal problems that sometimes have her spending half the day in the bathroom. And her doctor of ten years is in Hollywood, which is a haul from Santa Clarita. But her health has been declining, which makes it even more head-scratching that she would make an excuse not to go. Hell, her grouchy monster of a father volunteered to drive her so as far as I'm concerned, there are no excuses.
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These are my favorite people [Aug. 5th, 2014|03:51 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude

Every time I open a can, I look up to see one or both of them staring intently at me. Sorry guys, it's not always Wet Fud.
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My lady is not doing well [Aug. 4th, 2014|05:03 pm]
The Fortress of Snarkitude
Today she phoned, shaky and crying. Hasn't slept in 3 days, hasn't eaten in 2. Anxiety over everything from her cat coughing to her dad. Mostly her dad, who is a toxic bastard. His standard response to her being pale & shaking is to say something like "What the fuck is wrong with you now?"

He needs to be punched. But, not my call. She's getting to a doctor on Friday. I urged her to speed that up. She neglects too many important things like eating and sleeping, running out of her meds definitely hurts the situation.

Me? I'm just too hot. And broke.
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